Oh my goodness guys and girls, SO MUCH happened last night! This may be my longest post so far, but when I’m done it will be so worth it. As you’ll see, everything – even the tiniest details – has a purpose. While that purpose may not immediately be clear, God will show you right when you need to know and you’ll be like “WHOA!”. Trust me, this is a story you don’t want to skim through. 🙂
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No better place to start than at the beginning! As I was on my way to church with my mom, I was a bit sleepy. I assumed that it was from the warm chai tea latte I had only a few minutes before- sugar actually makes me tired- but I knew that even from a Starbucks latte there wasn’t enough sugar to make me that tired. I let it pass, not thinking anything of it.
Fusion (my church’s high school division) started to head into our building and we walk up the stairs to the Fusion room. The moment I hit the landing and was inside, I had an unexplainable happiness that I couldn’t contain. I acted very hyper, but I knew it wasn’t the latte that gave me the boost. As I said, sugar puts me to sleep. No one could explain it and while I am normally happy, this was almost…”I’m-about-to-explode-and-I-have-no-idea-why” kinda happy. Ever felt that?
This strange happiness lasted the entire service and I had no clue what made me so happy. (Later I found out what was going on, but that’s at the end of my story. :D)
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While having this unexplainable joy, I was worshipping with a smile. During worship they played the song “open up the floodgates”. God showed me the same picture He showed me at Illes des Cannes, of the reason why there’s so much rain here in Louisiana lately. It’s overflowing from the spirit and we don’t have to ask God to rain His fire or His presence down, it’s already here! (If you’ve no idea what I’m referring to, read my last post. ;D) I felt like God was telling me to tell Pastor Elijah (my youth pastor), and I still get terrible stage fright when He tells me to do something like this. I have been singing on stage in choirs and solos all my life but something about speaking in front of people makes me nervous. However, I was sure it was God, so I obeyed. Pastor Elijah said ok and told me to wait a minute and if he felt like there was a time for it then I could share. I said ok and returned to my seat, resuming worship.
He didn’t call me up or anything, and the first time this happened, I was upset. I thought to myself, “Was I mistaken? Perhaps the voice I heard wasn’t God and I was wrong to tell the pastor?” Now I realize what it is. When God tells us to do something, it isn’t always about bringing someone to Him or helping someone. Sometimes it’s a mere question: Will you obey? It wasn’t that I was wrong, the voice and words I was compelled to share were God’s but, He was testing my obedience.
Like I said, I still get scared when He says to share. As I returned to my seat and kept worshipping, the next song the band played was “You Make Me Brave”. I immediately heard God’s voice. He told me, “Trust Me. When I ask you to step out and speak, I am with you. I will give you courage.”
We need to remember that when God says go- even if it is a test of obedience- He already has everything set out for His plan to succeed. We don’t need to worry about the details, we just gotta go. He will make sure everything works out.
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I will do another post describing this story, but recently I was on Instagram and I came across a man calling God a “mythological creature” and insulting Him. I was and always have been angered by these sort of things, so I had to reply. After the gentleman and I had gone back and forth a few times, I ended with “God loves you so much.” and I left. (I will put this in a separate post I promise).
During the sermon, Pastor Elijah spoke about reaching one person at a time and how there are 6 places a lost person may be, and 4 a saved person may be. The lost may be one of the 6, but the first is “Resistant”. Immediately I thought of the man from Instagram, and God gave me clarity that he was resistant right now. Then, the 4th place a saved may be is “Sharing”. God showed me that this is where I am right now, with my blog and with stepping out of my comfort zone and speaking. I am sharing in this season of my life and recently I’ve lost the desire to serve as much as I used to. That’s ok though, because a few months ago one of my Spiritual Mentors told me God wanted me to be Mary, not Martha. I’m often the second, running around trying to do everything and serve everyone, but God was saying for me to just sit at His feet and listen. You can’t share what you don’t hear, can you?
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This wonderful night ended with me talking to my other Spiritual Mentor, Makayla. I was only telling her what I’ve told you, and how God had touched me that night, and before she even spoke I was drunk in God’s presence. Telling other people about what God is doing in my life brings the unbearable joy back, and sometimes I can barely finish my story! She said something that led to me seeing where the joy was from, and what God was doing by giving it to me. “Look at how you’ve grown though,” she said, “a few months ago you were pretty down about life in general an now look at you! You’re so happy, and that’s just from then to now look what God has done”. When she said ‘then to now’ my mind exploded! God showed me the reason I felt so happy when I climbed up that night. The bottom was where I was, and each stair was a different turning point where I encountered God. The top is what He wants me to be; childishly giddy all the time! Right now, I’m about in the top of the middle. I was so receptive at that point that I stayed on the ground laughing myself to tears for the next 15 minutes. I literally felt the Holy Spirit in me. I saw an image that inside my body there were no bones, no flesh. If you had cut me open in that moment you would have only seen pure white light flowing from me because God’s spirit was in me. I couldn’t think of any words and spoke very slowly because I had a hard time describing it to Makayla, and I couldn’t stop flailing my hands or arms. It was because there was so much of God in me I literally had no idea what to do with anything. Forgot how to speak, how to stand, almost how to do everything but breathe basically!
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So you see? Sometimes we may not know why things happen, they may seem random or pointless, but everything has a purpose and it will be revealed to you when God knows you need it. It may be a while, but when He shows you the reason, the action makes much more sense!!!
Little Things In Life 